The Hottest Summer Ever

The start of another silly story – I might finish this one day

It was the hottest day of the hottest ever summer,

It was the hottest ever summer since hot summers had been invented.

Temperatures soared into the hundreds, thousands and millions of degrees.

Ice cream melted in the freezer.

Cold drinks exploded to boiling point as soon as they were out the fridge.

People sizzled like steaks on a barbecue the minute they set foot outside.

And all they could do was sit, and swelter in their shuttered-up darkened sweaty houses, huddled round their cheap «made in China» discount air conditioners, watching TV to pass the time.

And the kids were bored watching all the old TV shows, whilst the parents guffawed at old comedy shows that weren’t funny anymore or sat on the edge of their seats gripped by old soap operas. «TV was better back then» announced the parents.

The TV weatherman droned on about global warming and how we would have more and even hotter summers than this one, whilst parents droned on about older, even hotter summers.

«Oh no, it was far hotter when we were kids, especially in 76.»

«When and where was 76?»  wondered the kids

And it was always like that with the parents, because when mum and dad were kids everything was better, easier, simpler, happier and hotter than nowadays,

«Hotter then 76?» asked the kids

«Oh no, it was far hotter then.» replied the parents with a nostalgic smile. Then they staretd again moaning about the hot weather, complaining that everything was just too hot at the moment, and the garden was dry and «it would be nice to see some rain.»

Then one day the weather broke. The sun disappeared, the sky turned an ominous grey, the clouds burst and the rains came and in no time the parents were moaning about the rain. It had rained all year. It had been nice to see some sun – oh dear, all this rain, summer had been washed away like it had never happened.

«Not like in 76,» said the parents.

«The summer just seemed to last forever.» said mum, wearing a dumb nostalgic gaze

«Ah» sighed dad, «We’ll never see summers like that again.»

And all the while the kids wondered. «When and where was 76?»

«When was 76?» asked Billy one day «Was it a long time ago?»

«76, that was the year of the big heat wave,» replied Billy’s dad, «back when me and your mum we’re just kids.» With that, Billy’s dad started to drone on again about how everything was better back when …

As dad rattled on, Billy just switched off (because he could never seem to switch his dad off.)

«If it was all better back then» thought Billy, «Does that mean it’s all bad now?»

Mum and dad would never admit that life for kids now was far better than when they were kids, so how could Billy ever know the truth?

Billy didn’t have to think long. The answer was easy. Just build a time machine and travel back to 76

To be continued …