Strictly Come Dancing (Up your arse)

Had a craving for a few nibbles, so I’ve just been down the supermarket (which is open despite what I have said in a previous post that actually appears after this post) Anyway, this being early Saturday evening, the place is heaving with youngsters buying their liquid provisions for a serious bout of binge drinking – anyway, as I stood there at the checkout, clutching my crisps, waiting ages while hordes of spotty, baseball cap coiffed teenagers bought cheap beer and vodka, I had a brainwave for an amusing game. It’s called “Up your arse.” (I daresay it exists already) but here is how it is played. Either in teams or individuals. One player starts telling a story, as he or she tells the story, it is up to the other players to intervene or interject with the phrase “up your arse”. Of course they have to place these words at some point where they make some sense. Each time they successfully place the phrase they score a point.


Player One – “Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess who lived in a far away magic land …

Player Two – “Up your arse.”

It is of course up to the storyteller to tell the story in such a way that the other player cannot say “up your arse” or tell the story in such a way that all anal interventions make no sense.


Player One – “Suddenly a huge hungry fire-breathinh dragon appeared …

Player Two – “up your arse.”

Of course this intervention makes no sense because the appropriate words would be “out your arse.”

So, you get the idea. Personally though I get the feeling that this game is a bit of a non starter, and there’s only me and my better half tonight, and one can play “up your arse” only so long when there are two of you. This really is a game for four or more players.  So tonight I’ll watch TV instead. I’ve just had a new satellite installed, so I can get all the  British TV channels, and tonight’s big offering on BBC 1 is “Strictly Come Dancing”, whilst on French TV, the great TV offering is “Danse avec les Stars” which is the French version of  “Strictly Come dancing.” (up your arse).

Apologies to American readers for using British spelling. I guess you have got the gist though.