Advice to the author on his birthday

Go well but go gently into this eve of your half century.

Cease all those smoky and licentious practices that may shorten your existence

Be as wise as your age permits.

Be as old as your age requires. Try not to be young as young people are today it will only meet in scorn and ridicule.

Do not dispense good advice to the young

Do not bore youth as you retail them with tales of your youth

Continue to tell youngsters that you have seen dead bands that they like and they can only dream of

Be as young or as old as the woman you feel.

Do not try and grow your hair too long so you look like you did as a teenager

Be happy that you still have a full head of hair

Assume middle aged spread with middle aged pride

Be happy

Do not buy a baseball cap